Sunday, July 22, 2007

Corrosive Transformer

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This weekend I have been in in a Blue Funk. I know I have to get a few things done but am in this horrid mood, not very good company and I seem to be as emotional as a teen. I wondered why and thought I may just read my horoscope to see if I could get cheered up somewhat, I mean they usually are so vague and positive I may even feel better so I went to a site and got this back after filling in my profile.
Saturday - Maximum restraint
During this time you are touchy and unsure of yourself, and so you are easily hurt or insulted, or you tend to be hurtful yourself - there may be triggers for these situations but in reality no obvious cause. Maximum restraint is called for in interpersonal interactions. You should really treat everyone with kid gloves to avoid doing harm to your relationships or to yourself. If you are already in dispute with someone, you should try to avoid this person at this time. Whatever it is about, an argument or difference of opinion that you want to settle or continue during this time, it would only lead mutual hurt.

Maybe that is why I decided to stay at the Karting all day... the one person there that I have a slight disagreement with about the Moon Hoax and other Conspiracy Theories before tried once again to convince me... I sensed a need to run away or punch him in the face... I only phoned M to find out what his plans were for the day... Felt that the less people I talked to the better. On the way home I picked up some salad things as I wanted to cook some boerewors and chips with salad. I was pleasantly surprised that L had made some Macaroni and Cheese with mince... no need for cooking so we had a decent meal and after watching TV we went to bed...
Sunday - Your negative side
Weak, transient effect: Today during the day you are inclined to keep your feelings and innermost thoughts to yourself. A sense of loneliness or isolation frequently accompanies this period of time, or depression and a general sense of pessimism. Domestic problems may also accompany this influence, usually because you feel that in some way your domestic life is not giving you what it should. This is part of a larger feeling that you are not getting support or assistance from anyone or anything, which may or may not be true. Your real problem is either that you are cut off from your emotions or that your emotions are too unpleasant to deal with. This influence may force you to briefly experience what you consider to be your negative side. Thus there is a strong conflict between what you think of yourself and what you think you should be.

Yeowch! This is scary... That is spot on, this morning I had woken up really feeling funky, I had these weird dreams and I think I actually cried in my sleep, my pillow was damp! My feelings are not A1 at present, in fact they are rather a deep shade of purple tinged with magenta. The reason being I dreamed that I had lost a friend and it really upset me because at present this friend is precious to me, however if we were to have met over the weekend I think my corrosive mood would have dissolved it like a pearl in vinegar... that cannot be allowed to happen.
So all this has made the muse in me put these words down to try and make sense of my feelings.

Lost without you - Robert Le Noury
Hot salty tears flow down my face
Thinking about you
To be lost without you would be unbearable
Thinking about you
You said you are not ready for more
You want my friendship
That is a given, it is unquestioned
But thinking of you
Hot salty tears flow down my face
Thinking about you
To be lost without you would be unbearable

Back from the mall... L wanted to go to the movies so just before lunch we went to the mall, bought tickets to see Transformers, had lunch at Catch22. The trout was delicious but the service was lacklustre, do not think I will be there again. (See the foul mood thing again?)
Transformers was awesome... the TV trailer does not do it justice, I was blown away by the CGI animation of the robots. At least that made me feel somewhat better. The Simpsons trailer had us laughing too, I just hope those were not all the gags... The Arnie character's line "I vos voted in to lead, not read" is classic.
Got to see a beautifull sunset as well, went to the track and moved the caravan just before sunset, the Cirrus clouds turned orange then pink as the sun set. Wish I had grabbed the camera!
So all in all I am feeling much better, Monday may just be a good day after all.
"I am a kind of paranoiac in reverse. I suspect people of plotting to make me happy". J. D. Salinger (1919 - )

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